poka bean

a month in retrospect: do's & don'ts learned in april '06

DO take the dog to the beach more.
DONT' let the dog drink large amounts of salt water so that she later becomes violently ill with diarrhea all over the house.

DO take your gym bag to work with you and change before you leave the office, thus tricking yourself into always going on your way home.
DON'T leave your gym bag in the back seat of your car in front of your house overnight where some hoodlum might spot it and think it is a purse and therefore smash in your back window in order to steal it.

DO hire a professional to do your taxes and give you tax advice.
DON'T hire a first-class a$$hole who insults you in your own home and then mails a note to your husband who wasn't home during the tax appointment that says, "Jon, I explained to your wife why you owe so much money but sometimes this tax business gets confusing so please call me if you have any questions." thus insinuating that you are a royal blond idiot who doesn't understand English and cannot possibly have intelligently explained everything to your husband yourself.

DO stew over the first-class a$$hole tax guy for a few weeks and mutter curses at him under your breath because he deserves it.
DON'T forget to stew over the first-class a$$hole tax guy for a few weeks and mutter curses at him under your breath because he deserves it.

DO take a week off with your husband over his Spring Break and enjoy long days at the beach during the random stint of hot, sunny weather in the middle of April.
DON'T get sunburned.

DO watch an entire season of The O.C. on dvd in one week's time.
DON'T underestimate your husband's viewing capacity for cheesy, smutty teen dramas and assume he will roll his eyes and make gagging noises whenever you turn it on. Shortly you will come home to find him watching an episode without you.

Posted by Poka Bean at 10:31 AM