Thursday, June 23, 2005

yes. for the millionth time, YES.

It’s the funniest thing. I’m getting married in 15 days and people keep asking me, “Are you getting excited?” DUH! What the heck do you think? I’m about to pull an Oedipus and gouge my eyes out? I’m more distraught than the day I learned that tortilla chips are FRIED, not baked? (GASP!) I am crying myself to sleep every night out of fear and dread?

Uh, no.

NEWSFLASH, folks. OF COURSE I’M EXCITED. I’ve been excited since Christmas. You know, when he proposed.

I know people are just sharing in our joy and making conversation but I just find the whole thing amusing. It’s like saying, “You just won $500 million dollars. Are you excited?”

NO!! I’M SO DOWN ON MY LUCK. WOE IS ME! I AM DESTITUTE. I WILL HAVE TO SCAVENGE ON THE STREETS AND SLEEP IN THE GUTTER FOREVER. I HAVE THE WORST LIFE AND NO CARDBOARD OR PENS TO EVEN MAKE A SIGN ABOUT IT. I AM HOPELESS. I AM FINISHED. I AM DOOMED!

Posted by Poka Bean at 9:17 AM

4 Comments

  1. Blogger Twinkle Twinkle Little Star posted at 2:35 AM  
    Okay...guilty as charged. I hope this blog was not inspired by the conversation we had yesterday in which I began the whole thing with the dreaded question...Sorry!
  2. Blogger Bearca posted at 8:40 AM  
    My favorite part is the no cardboard or pens to even make a sign about it. Now THAT would be the ultimate hopelessness.
  3. Blogger Poka Bean posted at 10:56 AM  
    starlet...don't worry. this totally wasn't inspired by you, mostly by people at work who ask me the same thing over and over again. in fact i don't even remember you asking me if i was excited which is probably all the more proof that i am since i have a hard time paying attention to anything anyones says. as july 8th draws near, i have tunnel vision. and also tunnel...um...hearing?
  4. Blogger Emily posted at 8:37 AM  
    I think you should come up with some snappy responses to the question, and find pleasure in their quizzical looks.

    Here are some that come to mind to the question of, "Are you excited?":

    -"Yes. Because I'm a virgin and I can't wait to have ALL the sex."

    -"I'm not NOT excited. I think it will be pretty ok."

    -"Yes, but it's going to be difficult finding time for my lover."

    -"Yes, but mostly because we're moving and I'm getting a new job where I can drink all the alcohol."

    ...or my personal favorite
    -"Listen, I don't have much time... they're watching. I'm not getting married at all, it's all a cover up -- they're exiling me to an island off Alaska. Please come find me."

    Yes. That's the best one.

Post a Comment

« Home